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It’s been about 20 weeks, 20 very busy weeks, busy with work, busy baby prep, busy with life.  We’re bridging the gap between week 28 and 29 and we’re officially in our third trimester.  We’ve had a slew of doctor appointments that almost led to an amniocentesis, but we decided to back out at the last minute.  The risk of miscarriage did not outweigh the risk of self-assurance.  We have our fingers crossed and are hoping for the best.  These are some images from one of our ultrasounds of little Dorothy to be.  I’ve taken to calling her Newt, we’ll see how long it takes for my wife to figure out what that’s from.

 dorothyroseupson2

In the meantime, we’ve been reading our books and buying baby and maternal gear by the truckload.crib  Some notable purchases include designer maternal wear, an $84 pregnancy pillow, and just today we bought our crib and combo unit.  Some assembly required doesn’t quite explain the amount of frustration involved in putting these things together.  Maybe this made sense at the factory in Thailand but I’m having trouble stuffing my fat American sausage fingers between the slats to get at these last few screws.  Having that and the bureau though really starts making it sink in.  In three months, we’re going to have a baby! 

We’ve been learning a lot too.  It’s incredibly helpful having friends and family around the same age with experience.  Prior to the furniture purchase my mother and sister ran me through Baby’s R Us and scanned all the things I had no idea we’d need. Two types of thermometers, binky carriers, bottle sterilizers, the list is long and overwhelming.  I picked up harness for my wife while we there since she is on her feet at work, definitely helps her mobility and her back.

Next on the list is a car to fit all the wonderful things we bought, oh and the baby!  We’re looking at the Toyota Highlander after screening a half dozen other makes and models.  Every week is a major project ticked off the list and one step closer to prepared parenthood.

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Morning sickness.  What a misnomer.

exorcist_vomit

It’s a all-day sickness for some women, one of them being my poor wife.  I got home last night and she had already been vomiting all day, unable to even keep down a few sips of water.  At 8:30pm we called it and I took her to the hospital.  Luckily she’s works at the one we went to and her friends there got her in fast.  A couple of liters of saline and some esophogeal relaxers later and we were on our way home where she managed to finally keep down some Cheereos.

Moral of the story gents, if you have some sick days save em up cause you may need them for these little emergencies.

Week 6-7

As excited as we were to tell people about our pregnancy, we’ve been told by friends and family to keep the announcement to ourselves for the first few months until we’re out of the likely timeframe for miscarriages.  Only tell the people you are comfortable informing in the event of some bad news.

I’m pretty bad at keeping secrets though, and my wife is too.  so far I’ve told all but a few of my friends, all of family, and a couple of the guys I work with who also have kids.  Mainly because I wanted to ping them about what I should be preparing for and what to expect.

My wife also made the caveat that we don’t buy any baby furniture or supplies until after the first trimester, but conceded to letting me set up an area in our bedroom for a crib and changing table.  I spent a weekend clearing out a good sized spot and cleaning for when the time comes. 

We’re off the hook too for buying the expensive stuff too, as my sister is very anxious to get rid of her garage full of supplies and furniture.

The next big things I’m thinking about are making sure our insurance covers us and finding a good nanny to help out my wife a couple times a week.

Week 6-7:

About a month ago, end of October, I learned that my new wife and I were expecting a baby. We’ve been married a couple months and were both pretty motivated to procreate, so we weren’t being safe by any means, but given our age (mid-30’s), and relatively unhealthy, workaholic lifestyles, it was a bit surprising that we were successful on our relative first try. Granted, in our first month my wife was bewildered that her EPT didn’t yield positive results, but we really hadn’t tried to match any ovulation timing. Our second month was our “getting serious” time. And low and behold, we got serious.

Baby serious.

I was in Los Angeles visiting with friends when my wife gave me the news. The herald? The EPT digital urination stick. I rushed home the next day and we used another one, the last in the box to make sure. Sure enough, we were pregnant.

This signaled some inchoate need in my being to start nesting. I’ve always been excited about the prospect of siring my own children. Plus the responsibility of being the last of my namesake, added an unspoken, and slightly antiquated motivation.  Now that we were successful, I wanted to start preparing.  To match my anxiousness, my wife immediately went out and bought no less than six books on pregnancy preparation.

The list:

What to Expect When You’re Expecting – Quickly discounted by our married-with-children friends as a collection overly cautious wives’ tales regarding your pregnancy, indeed, it was nice to get the over-protective perspective.

The Expecting Cookbook – I’ve yet to read this one, not being much a of a cook myself.

The Pregnancy Cookbook – Ibid.

Your Pregnancy Week by Week – My favorite so far, easy to digest, with lots of timely and relevant information.

The Expectant Father – Another good guidebook for the breadwinner. Though my wife is a doctor, she is in residency, and thus, I’m making twice as much as she does, and have to worry about about the financial implications of a pregnancy and how to prepare for it.

The Active Woman’s Guide to Pregnancy – Seems like this book is geared to the fitness mavin housewife, which though my wife is very physical at work, and an athlete at heart, the demands of her job dictate that on the days when she’s not working 80 hours a week, she sleeps to recover. This book might be more relevant to the mother-to-be who is not going through a major formative career choice, but as of now, the demands of her work shows no sign of ceasing.

Our first order of business according to the books was to schedule a doctor’s appointment, which we did. Much to the chagrin of my wife, who was suffering from the extreme side effects of morning sickness (which is a promising sign, by the way, the more sick the mother in the first few months, the more likely that the baby is healthy), we were informed by the sonogram that we were only six and a half weeks in, not seven.

In the coming week leading up to today, I’ve watched my wife’s physical condition deteriorate at an alarming rate to the point where I’m maintaining a stoic exterior while silencing a nagging subconscious voice demanding I take her to a hospital. The books, and her own medical experience, tell us that she is experiencing the normal effects for where she’s at time-wise, but when you have to watch your wife suffer from nausea 24 hours a day non-stop, you tend to get a bit concerned.

Tonight was a good example. I called home before heading back from work as I usually do to ask if she has any cravings. It goes without saying that in the last 2-3 weeks, my wife has developed unique cravings and aversions to food. Tonight I got her her current culinary delight, a large hummus sandwich from Togo’s. Granted, this is a woman who detests fast food on any normal day.

Halfway through her sandwich and after a digesting period where we enjoyed a game of chess, I proposed she take her prenatal vitamin. My wife loathes this part of her evening, having to swallow a giant horsepill which doesn’t go well with nauseous.

She was a trooper and choked it down, yet alerted me with the news that she had just suppressed vomiting. I didn’t pay any mind until she lept from her seat on the couch with countenance of marked alacrity, quickly broken by a torrent of sputum which she ejected all over her Apple laptop. She managed to throw up two more times on the carpet before I made it to her with the plastic puke bucket.

Fathers to be, be warned. Be prepared.  Have that puke bucket close at hand.

I stocked my wife’s purse with a “morning sickness” kit that the Week by Week book recommended, with paper towels, plastic sick bags, toothbrush, toothpaste, and mouthwash, but really, who can plan for random events? To this date she’s been sick at least 3 times and has not used the emergency kit.  From the looks of things, she’s going to be in semi-hungover state all day for the next 2-3 months.  We’ll see how she feels about having more than two kids after another month.

End Part 1

November 2017
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